it's the 4th business day since i've been voluntarily unemployed!
so far i can no longer tell which day of the week it is as every day feels like the weekend! :)

Things that I finally got around to do..
1) listen to my favorite radio show in the morning not while i'm driving to work - the beat 94.5 the kid carson show!
2) sleep any time in the day! - i've been sleeping until i wake up naturally and not cuz of any alarms!
3) cleaned up my pile of clothes/shopping bags in the corner of my room - i realized how many socks i've bought for the last month and all not winter suitable!
4) discovered i have bottles of unfinished chivas, crown royal and plum sake in my room - i thought i finished them already..hmm
5) found a lot of change in my room - and now i feel rich! love finding coins.. it's like a treasure hunt!
6) went grocery shopping by myself! - and i keep on forgetting i bought mushroom soup so i end up with 3 cans in the cabinet now
7) get to tutoring on time - my students were surprised.. "what are u doing here at 430?" i'm suppose to be here at 430... " i know! but usually ur not here until 445 or 5!! " .... lll-_-
8) make it through the day without coffee! - i've gone starbucks free for the last few days!
9) baked a cake at home - i haven't baked in the longest time! :)
10) most importantly... spent a lot of quality time with family... i hug mommy multiple times each day~ daddy's not a hugger but i fluff his short short hair every time i walk by him

^____________________________________________^

半夜收到一個簡訊
"我明天要結婚了, 很抱歉未能當面告知, 希望得到你的祝福"
愕然
拿著手機看了又看
發獃了許久
拿起來又看

愕然變成惱怒
感覺被欺瞞
明明距離上次聯絡也不久
竟提也沒提

惱怒變成不解
為什麼要以這種方式告知
與訂婚通知一般讓人十分措手不及

不解變成接受
應該慶幸最少是本人通知吧
總比某天在路上遇到才自己發現來得好

接受變成釋然
細想後反而覺得以這樣的方式知道
對彼此都是好事

自知十分魯莽
如果當面告知
大概臉上青紅皂白全被看到
決不是好事
惱怒時許多的問題
實在多餘不需問
"為什麼..." "你不是說.." "你答應過.."
反讓彼此尷尬而已

感謝有簡訊
讓我有迴轉的空間

閉著眼睛坐在陽臺的椅子上想了又想
快一個小時過去
絞盡腦汁想個得體的回應
“祝願你婚姻充滿了愛與快樂"
琢磨了半天結果只得出這麼個老掉牙句子
一點也未能表達心裡複雜的想法
不管了
表面功夫先做
再怎麼樣也不必讓對方不安

不久後對方回覆
”謝謝, 十分掙扎該否把所有事情告知, 怕嚇著你"
謝謝, 今晚驚嚇成份已滿盈, 再多怕難全盤接受
"要或是不要說什麼改天再考慮吧, 明天是重要的一天, 早點休息"
這樣回該夠識大體了吧

這樣一來一回已感疲憊
慶幸有簡訊
修行未滿
面對面真不知如何是好

睡不著

已經許久沒有半夜睡不著
近來太累巴不得下班回家賴死在床上
隨便看些沒營養的電視節目
就算不看也要開著熱鬧的綜藝節目
感覺才不孤單

還是拒絕在另外一個網頁上寫
太容易遇到不喜歡的人或事
討厭下班後還要裝的感覺

關心自己的人會來這裡看那就夠了
寫
是為自己不是為了讓誰誰誰能看到
想寫些快樂的事
想了半天
想不到
只能作罷